有日途經惡鬼國，在路上遇見一位衣衫襤褸的大叔，面露痛苦的表情並跪在地上大叫：
One day, while passing through the land of evil spirits, I encountered a shabbily dressed old man on the road, who had a pained expression on his face and was kneeling on the ground, shouting loudly.
「痛恨啊！我痛恨我的生活和國家！嫉妒啊！我要得到所有他人所得之物！憤怒啊！我要毀滅所有人並吃下所有能吃之物。」
“Hatred! I hate my life and my country! Envy! I want to have everything that others have! Anger! I want to destroy everyone and consume all that can be eaten＂
我問：「大叔啊，請告訴我你的苦難是什麼？ 」
I asked, “Old man, please tell me what is causing your suffering?”
大叔說：「我身處惡鬼之國，身邊的惡鬼不但隨處互相啃食，惡鬼更會把小孩的內臟作為盤中之食，四周充斥住它牠們排放的毒氣，水源更被牠們所污染。造成這個國家變成惡鬼之地是該死的魔王！我一生為牠獻上我的信仰，努力配合牠們的文化，到頭來受盡這苦難我究竟為了誰！天從來沒有站在我們這邊！我的痛苦就是身體與精神的雙重摧殘。」
The old man said, “I am living in the land of evil spirits, where the evil spirits not only devour each other everywhere, but also use the intestines of children as food. The air is filled with the toxic gas they emit, and the water sources are polluted by them. The cursed demon king is responsible for turning this country into a land of evil spirits! I have devoted my whole life to worship him and have tried to conform to their culture, but in the end, I am suffering for whom? The heavens have never been on our side! My pain is the double torment of body and mind.”
我說：「對天來說，人只是蜉蝣，我們也只是十幾億的蜉蝣。你無意踩死的蟻你會為牠默哀嗎？你踩死螻蟻之前會思考蟻蟲一生的命運將斷送在你腳下嗎？其實你的痛苦的本質不是天所注定，是你的選擇一早就被自己所限制。」
I said, “To the destiny and god, humans are like mayflies, and we are just over a billion of those mayflies. Would you mourn for an ant that you accidentally stepped on? Would you contemplate the fate of an ant’s entire life before you crush it under your foot? Actually, the essence of your suffering is not predetermined by the destiny and god, but rather limited by your own choices from the very beginning.’
大叔說：「你別吹了，怎麼說？被我自己所限制？按你的邏輯來說蜉蝣也能配有命運嗎？」
The old man said, “Stop talking nonsense. What do you mean by limited by my own choices? According to your logic, can mayflies also have destiny?”
我說：「沒錯，就是被你自己所限制。因為要你隱居深山對你來說不可能，你要換個地方生活又是不可能，更遑論要你去野外獨自求生掙扎？」
I said, “That’s right, limited by your own choices. Because it’s impossible for you to live in seclusion in the mountains, it’s also impossible for you to move to another place to live and survive alone in the wilderness.”
大叔說：「你能？你告訴我你怎麼能？」
The old man said, “Can you do it? Tell me how you can do it?”
我說：「你告訴我為什麼不能。」
I said, “Tell me why you can’t?”
大叔說：「因為你也是蜉蝣！你能放下在這裡可以換到食物的錢和安全堅固的房屋，脫離各種社會關係單獨去面對這個未知的世界？你是這種偉人的機率在這個國家是十幾億分之一啊！」
The old man said, “Because you are also a mayfly! Can you give up the money that you can exchange for food here and the secure and sturdy house, and face this unknown world alone, detached from all social relationships? The probability of you being such a great person is one in over a billion here!”
我說：「我當然是蜉蝣，問這個問題之前你應該要多了解別人的生活。你就每天向做好一隻惡鬼為目標奮鬥吧！享受每天與其他惡鬼互相啃食，每天與其享用小孩的內臟， 每天憤怒和嫉妒其他惡鬼的生活。努力吧！」
I said, “Of course I am also a mayfly. But before asking this question, you should try to understand other people’s lives more. Just strive every day to be a good evil spirit! Enjoy devouring each other with other evil spirits every day, enjoy consuming the intestines of children, and feel angry and jealous of the lives of other evil spirits every day. Work hard!”
大叔說：「你應該救贖我！而不是與我一起沉淪！」
The old man said, “You should redeem me, not sink with me!”
我說：「不，沒有人應該救誰，沒有人應該成為別人的救世主。」
I said, “No, no one should save anyone, and no one should become someone else’s savior.”
我接著說：「要有『被你自己限制』的覺知就是答案。你的限制就是小看了人類的生存能力，小看了你自己。你的祖先在野外掙扎求存茹毛飲血幾萬年。寄蜉蝣於天地，置滄海之一粟，與天地共生，與萬物合一 。怎麼到你這代就成這個鳥樣啊，你實在給你祖先丟臉啊！哈哈哈哈哈！」
I continued to say “The awareness of ‘being limited by yourself” is the answer. Your limitation is underestimating human survival ability and underestimating yourself. Your ancestors struggled for survival in the wild, eating raw meat and drinking blood for tens of thousands of years. They were like insects in the world, a single grain in the vast ocean, coexisting with the world and uniting with all things. How did it come to this in your generation, you are really disgracing your ancestors! Hahaha!”
大叔說：「我明白了！人的韌性與生俱來！你應該感謝我給你一個好心情。」
The old man said, “I understand now! Human resilience is innate! You should thank me for giving you a good mood.”
我說：「我每天都有好心情。是因為我只是早早接受了自己只是蜉蝣，每天都準備下一刻的死亡。對了， 你需要我教你怎樣生起一個火嗎？你需要我教你怎樣捕魚嗎？」
I replied, “I have a good mood every day. It’s because I have accepted early that I am just an insect, and I am prepared for death at any moment. By the way, do you need me to teach you how to start a fire? Do you need me to teach you how to catch fish?”
人成為惡鬼的重要特質－「過度執著」The important characteristic that turns humans into evil spirits – “excessive attachment”
我們的社會用歷史上與社會上很多所謂「成功人士」如何艱苦奮鬥作為例子，鼓勵社會上面每一個人都要從各類型困難中突破自己艱苦奮鬥，將各種社會對成功的標準強加於所有人，讓所有人相信自己只要努力就一定會「成功」。以「成功」等於「致富」為例，但我們最後我們往往看到的是不但在現行的經濟模式下是不可能實現每個人有相同「均富」的機會（沒有「窮」的概念就沒有「富」的概念），更沒有一個良好與公平的社會制度去保障個人權益。
Our society often uses the examples of many so-called “successful people” from history and society, who have struggled through hardships, to encourage everyone to break through various types of difficulties and strive hard. Society imposes various standards of success on everyone, making them believe that as long as they work hard, they will definitely “succeed.” However, take “success equals wealth” as an example, what we often see in the end is that not only is it impossible to achieve the same “wealth for all” opportunity for everyone under the current economic model (without the concept of “poor,” there is no concept of “rich”), but there is also no good and fair social system to protect individual rights and interests.
所以很多變成「惡鬼」的人都有一種「過度執著」的特質，相信只要努力就一定會有成功的一天。為此他們付出所有時間和精力去迎合社會上所有的遊戲規則，為的只是讓自己的生活達到社會所營造的美好夢境。當有一天夢碎了，這種「過度執著」並不會消失，它會轉化成怒氣吞噬身邊的一切，玉石俱焚永不超生。
Therefore, many people who become “evil spirits” have a trait of “excessive attachment,” believing that as long as they work hard, they will definitely be successful one day. To achieve this, they devote all their time and energy to conform to all the rules of society, just to make their lives reach the beautiful dreams created by society. However, when the dream shatters one day, this “excessive attachment” does not disappear. Instead, it transforms into anger, devouring everything around them, destroying both the good and the bad without the chance for redemption.
鯨落筆記whale fall notes 